Bonkers Loony Conspiracy

Warning: may contain traces of a nut.

Thursday, October 26, 2006

The Legend Has Returned

We're in full Hallowe'en overdrive here at Bonkers headquarters, ladies and mentalmen!

This coming Tuesday, everybody who is everybody (so Elspeth and me, then) is dressing up and hitting the Castle that is New to celebrate the spooky season! Need to make the most of it, too, as when Tuesday is over Christmas begins on Wednesday (there's nothing to stop it now) and I'll have to get decorations for the House of Death... 'tis the season to be bankrupt. Anywho, guess who I'm going as?

Two previous options were Dracula (the classic, but too easy and every other guy will be him) or a Starship captain, probably Kirk (but that's quite frankly the scariest thing in the entire known universe, even more so than the fact that Gordon Brown could be Prime Minister this time next year). But they've been rejected for...

All I need is the whip and I'm done! I'm obviously going hatless, too, because the Castle that is New is fresh out of Zorro hats (what an essential item to be missing). But I have a bandanna (soon to have eyeholes), a cape (under construction), some great boots and black leather gloves! Score!

Elspeth is going as a killer bee, with a tu-tu skirt that, if it were any shorter, would be a belt. Lucy is Pebbles from The Flintstones. Both the ladies' costumes were constructed yesterday with fabric paint, which was much hillarity! Oh, and the cat sat in my bag and fell asleep... yes... anywho, that's Hallowe'en, folks! Enjoy it, too, because like I said, Christmas is coming and every post from Wednesday onwards will involve Christmas in some way!

You can't fight it... peace out, madcap fans!

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Very Short Life Expectancy

Just flaunting my new Profile image, madcap Bonkers fans...

I should take this chance to tell you that I'm really getting into my Imperial China course! We did an assignment today about, among others, General Li Kuang. He's a tragic figure and I'm fascinated my his story. I'm going to do some more research on him (which is something I never, ever do about anything... except Casino Royale, of course...)!

Hence the new picture: I've found a ton of new Daniel Craig publicity images. I'm so excited about this film, more than any other film I've ever been excited about!

Anywho, I'm just piddling about here, so I'm going to wrap things up. Peace out!

Monday, October 16, 2006

The Con Of Man

Good evening, madcap fans!

Coming to you live from Bonkers unofficial headquarters (ie, the library) is this latest edition, in association with Nescafe Gold Blend: the only thing keeping me awake long enough to stumble to university and gain access to the internet long enough to string together a sentence or two.

As many of you will know, recent events here in the Castle that is New have prevented a more regular update. Without going into details, I'm happy to report things are looking up and getting back on track: the guys are back from Paris tonight, I've got The Da Vinci Code on DVD, and my work is going as well as can be expected (although I may have to write my assignment, due in tomorrow at 10:00, at 09:00 in the morning, an hour before. At only 250 words, though, this takes all of fifteen minutes, so panic over)!

In response to my official request to Bethesda Softworks (okay, not my request, but I like to think it helped matters), there is a tentative release date of 8th December for Star Trek: Encounters, and Casino Royale's UK release date has been moved forward one day, to Thursday 16th November. The soundtrack is due on 13th November and boasts 25 tracks, and apparently is amazing!


Due to limited contact with the outside world the past few days, news and politics are hardly my strong suits at the moment, but give me time to peruse the BBC News homepage and I'll be back with witty political commentary in no time!

All in all, the future's looking rather stocked...

Peace out, ladies and mentalmen. I shall return!

Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Ha! In Your Faces, Fellow Students!

What a lovely way to start the day...

I don't, of course, mean the title literally: I love my fellow students (some as friends, some as colleagues, some in a way that will make readers snigger and say "easy target"... okay, maybe the last one's a joke). However, at 09:00 on a Wednesday, it's a great feeling to get one-up and be ahead of the game. Allow me to explain...

I'm working on a HIS2033: Imperial China assignment, which requires two chunks of text to be analysed. Due to roughly one hundred people taking the course and only one copy of one of the books available, you can imagine how challenging getting the book is. With only 24 hours on the clock and the situation becoming more desperate by the second, with lives at stake, I now know how Jack Bauer feels! So, despite my body saying "Go on, stay in bed, you've only had five hours sleep... go on, sleep some more... stay in bed... eat chocolate... play PlayStation, do nothing today..." I was up at 07:00 and at the library for when the doors opened at 08:55. Early bird really does catch the worm: I have the book for the next four hours, plenty of time to make a photocopy and escape into the distance, laughing like a madman!

Downside? Well, there always is with me, and this time it's a biggie: I'm supposed to be in a European Politics lecture right now. However, a lot of the first few lectures are going over old ground, and I have friends there who promise copies of their notes. I know these aren't excuses, but with a deadline and the clock ticking, I had no choice. At least I didn't pull a gun on the library receptionist and scream "CTU! Tell me where the bomb... uh, I mean, book! Tell me where the book is!"

One assignment down, four to go... and that's just Imperial China...

In other news, madcap Bonkers fans, the 92 Bayswater Road 'House of Death' (now with extra death) has finally been visited by the nice people at RM Accomodation! Actually, the guy they sent round was really kind and covered pretty much everything on the list... he even returned after-hours with a drawer he had fixed earlier on, but that wasn't dry in time to install it. We now have lights in the bathroom, lights in the kitchen, lights in my room, a kitchen bin, a clean front door, a clean dishwasher, a fixed shelf in the bathroom, a fixed toilet seat and a clean back yard. The damp in my bedroom is "a big job and an ongoing project", but it's hardly serious: I've been living there for a month or so now and I haven't grown a second head or webbed toes or anything. Besides, it really is a big job!

In fact, aside from a quick food shop later today, a three-hour chunk of non-stop lectures and seminars tomorrow and a spot of tidying my room, I've got a clear horizon. Which bodes well for poker night! I'm going to win so much... not money, mind, plastic chips... but they're all mine!

In the political spectrum, there's exciting news as regards the Conservative Party Conference and weblogs like mine: David Cameron has launched the excellently-named "Webcameron", a personal weekly weblog where other party members can post their thoughts, chat with David and generally talk future policy, current politics and anything else in between. I love the idea: Cameron is keeping up the image of being in-touch with the voters, modern, sophisticated and willing to listen and show himself as an accountable politician, with his ideas open to public access and scrutiny. One thing I've learned from studying politics is that all politicians are supposed to be open to public access and scrutiny, but can you imagine His Tonyness doing something like this? Closest we ever got was the piece of New Labour puffery a couple of years back, the 'Big Conversation', which basically boiled down to, "Tony talks, you listen". Nice...

I know I seem to always go on about the Conservatives and ignore the other parties (except to attack them), and that this is rather biased. I apologise, but to be completely honest, the government of Labour is getting away with absolute murder and mayhem: whatever good they do (and admittedly often do) is overshadowed by the negative aspects. The Liberal Democrats, the "third party" of a two-party system, have nice ideas some of the time but lack the weight and power to make a difference. In my view, the Conservative Party have the heritage and experience to be successful leaders, and despite a few splutters in the past (which I gladly recognise: Iain Duncan Smith, for example. While Dave Davis is the Tory politician who used to be in the SAS, good old Duncan Smith was the only one who managed to get in and out without anybody noticing) I believe they have the ideas, the future and the get-up-and-go to make a decent country out of modern Britain. Because, let's face it, anything's better than the state of the nation at the moment...

Wow, I've banged on a lot today! I'm wrapping this up sharpish, then: I do, after all, have an assignment to write! Greetings to Mum, Kate, Sandra and all the other hard workers at UniS, heads-up to Matt (hope you feel better soon) and a shout out to Dad, who really needs to start leaving work before 18:00 (go for a beer around five, you'll love it)!

Peace out, ladies and mentalmen... it's great to be back!

Monday, October 09, 2006

Official Request to Bethesda Softworks

This is an official request to Bethesda Softworks, a video game publishing comapany currently holding the licence to create video games based on the Star Trek franchise.

Due to Star Trek celebrating it's 40th Anniversary, you've graced multiple gaming platforms with brand new space combat games based around the starships and space battles of the famous science fiction show. One of these titles, Star Trek: Encounters for the PlayStation2, has already been released in the United States. Two more titles are planned for release in the next few months, including Star Trek: Tactical Assault for PSP and Star Trek: Legacy for Xbox360.


There has been no mention whatsoever of a UK release date or PAL territory conversion for these products. While mentioned fleetingly in the UK games media and websites, no official details have been released. Some rumours even indicate that there will be no release in the UK or Europe.

UK-based Star Trek fans have made a huge contribution to the franchise over the years, and it is safe to say that it wouldn't be as successful as it has been without the input, loyalty and support of the hundreds of thousands (if not millions) of British 'Trekkies'.

Therefore, could we UK-based Star Trek fans at least have a confirmed release date of these games? A poor advertising campaign and little-to-no media coverage will simply ensure the product does badly in the charts and make Star Trek look like a total washout when it comes to gaming. You will do badly, we will do badly, and the games will become difficult to obtain from retailers who depend on product popularity when taking stock. So please, Bethesda Softworks, don't forget the PAL territories and give us your excellent Star Trek 40th Anniversary games!

Many thanks, from a concerned fan and (rather obsessed) gamer.