The Sentinel

Oh my lordy-lord, madcap Bonkers fans... what a failings.

Since you heard from Bonkers headquarters, my good self has completed two exams on the subject of the politics of the United States of Americaland. Well, I say completed... I mean struggled through to the bloody conclusion, cuts across my face and sweat and tears forming the words on the page. So, all in all, it went as expected, then.

Remember last year's multiple choice examination on International Political Theory? How the questions were as simple as What is the capital city of England? A: London ? B: 1942? in all seriousness? Well, let me give you an example of a multiple choice question from last week's American government and politics one: Calculate the exact amount spent on the US Defence budget during the months October-December of 1935 converted into Yen. Based on your answer, what did Richard Nixon have for dinner on the evening of 7th April 1972? A: Chicken kiev? B: $253.02? C: Cuban Missile Crisis? D: The House of Representatives? I mean, come on! While the answer is blatantly D, I just felt like it wasn't going well...

Then came the essay-style questions. We were tasked with answering two in two hours. I turned over the paper, saw one I liked, answered it very well, felt pleased... then looked at the other six available questions and realised I didn't have an answer for any of them. I hurridly cobbled together something awkward about the November 2006 mid-terms, using A-Level stuff I'd learned about voting patterns, and left the room.

So now, with all the vigilance of a sentinel, I'm waiting for the results. Add to this the 63% I already know I got for the US essay and I think my overall mark will be a low 40%. And that's if I've passed at all. Also I looked over my Imperial China essay I handed in earlier on in the semester and realised it's absolute nonsense, so brilliant: I'm coming to August!

I've had a good few days of sitting in bed and watching Friends on DVD (oh yes, I got "The One With All Ten Seasons" from HMV... in other words, the complete saga of the sitcom is all mine! I'm halfway through Season 2 and I've realised I'm actually Chandler Bing: could I be more of a sarcastic and jokey layabout?) and eating biscuits. This morning I began an extensive job hunt, as I'm desperately short on cash when I reach the end of terms and, with Easter approaching faster than anybody actually realises (hello? Seven weeks? Panic! Grahrheaherhahshah, etc.), I need some extra cash in my back pocket, mainly for the House of Death (now with extra death and no extra cash). Oh, and the forthcoming release of Casino Royale on DVD needs to be purchased. Oh oh, and I'm now buying books for my new courses, which started this afternoon. Oh oh oh, and they're cool.

For now, however, I'm going to sign off, watch an episode of Friends, play some Medal of Honour: European Assault (in other words, shoot some Nazi stormtroopers) and simply chill out for a few hours. Hey, I think I've earned it...

Peace out, ladies and mentalmen. I shall inevitably return.